Ramblings of the Mildly Insane

If I had stalker tendencies, I probably would have dropped everything to follow the Lamborghini that rolled past me this morning. Instead, I settled for taking a picture.

Wouldn’t want the driver to get the wrong idea. Last time I stared that hard at a car, the driver smiled and said, “I see you checkin’ me out.” To which I replied, “Oh sorry. I think you have the wrong idea. I just want to know if your car’s single.”

“I’m a single mom, too. I have a cat.”

“Reese’s Pieces and grapes does not a healthy diet make.”

“It may not work like that in some people’s worlds, but it works like that in mine.”

“Pain In The Ass Passive Aggressive Nightmare”

This is not a bonafide teli-ism as I did not come up with it, but it was so damn funny, I couldn’t help but steal it and blog it. (credit goes to J. and S.H. for this one)

“Those are the things that grab you by your heartstrings and swing you right round ’til you feel like you’re going to be sick from giddiness.”

“he bought me beer, he bought me pizza, he bought me flowers, and he bought me ice-cream and cheesecake - man that was the most romantic week ever.”

“I’m not drunk, I just can’t feel my legs.”

Disclaimer: this only happened once, on my 21st b-day due to someone I know challenging me while I was already drunk to drink an entire bottle of something (???) by myself in 10 minutes knowing darn well I wouldn’t refuse a challenge which made me even drunker…since that day, I have not been drunk, ever, ever, ever again…

Ha “un-named” person, now you can no longer tease me about this - now the entire world knows…pretty slick huh?

“remember: smile - it’s good for the soul”

“I’d rather be a little insane and admit it than be a lot insane and in denial. “